“…so much can be revived. Relationships we’ve given up on, dreams we’ve let go of, things we’ve convinced ourselves we can’t do. Everything can be revived. We just have to breathe life into it.”
-Rachel Brathen (Yoga Girl)
When I completed my yoga teacher training, I was over the moon. It was a dream I had manifested since I was 16, and it was another accomplishment completed in such an early time of my life. However, as almost a month has flown by, I have recognized that I really haven’t been making the time to get on the mat, or go to class, or organize some practice time/class planning with my other yogi’s in the community. I haven’t “made progress” on submitting letters of intent, completing CEU’s, getting any personal yoga hours in, and I have to be completely honest on why I haven’t…..I am perpetually EXHAUSTED.
On top of working my regularly scheduled career (which is now changing, because I just got a new job!), I have to come home, make dinner, take care of our pup, water the plants, everything under the sun essentially. While at work (before this new job), I sat at a computer for about eight hours — you would think that sitting on a machine for an entire day wouldn’t be exhausting, but truly, the work was mind numbing enough that I got used to coming home and just laying down for about two hours when I was off the clock.
Mind numbed, perpetually exhausted, and still transitioning into this now career-working-house-having-post-bachelor-grad-woman, has been incredibly tough. I do think, however, it is the life balance that we all seek out, but it’s just in a form that is a lot less wanted and really unexpected.
BUT, these feelings and actions come for a reason, just like all feelings do. Only time will start to surface when we have to start finally unpacking the boxes of tasked-in-the-background emotions, in order to get the rest of our real-life-tasks completed, and with a more, energetic, attitude.
As I have begun to finally unpack my “background tasks,” in order to figure out why I have been in such a lack-of-energy and half-assed motivation state, I came across a post from Rachel Brathen (Yoga Girl) over instagram:
“Sitting in this little nook we just created in our dining room. We built a big kitchen bench into a corner we normally never used and now, this whole floor of the house is different. This used to be their corner I had to make an effort to reach with the broom; it’s where no one ever sat; where the dogs used to sleep when no one was home. We had a weird little table here that somehow always seemed to collect the things we didn’t know what to do with; bills we’d already paid, half-used up sticks of lip balm, charging cables, boxes of matches. It was a dead corner of the house – we spent no energy here. And then one day I walked by and saw the light come in from the window in a beautiful way I’d never seen before and it hit me: we should put a sofa here. I made the call and got a carpenter over and it’s two weeks later and now I’m sitting here for the first time. The sunlight does flow into this space in a very special way at this time of the morning. It’s gorgeous, actually. I had a rough morning but took a break to sit down and drink my juice and I just realized: there is life here now. I created a space to be where I thought there was none.
It reminds me of the fact that so much can be revived. Relationships we’ve given up on, dreams we’ve let go of, things we’ve convinced ourselves we can’t do. Everything can be revived. We just have to breathe life into it. My morning has life to it now, just from me taking a moment to sit here and appreciate the light and drink my juice and write this.
So I guess what I’m trying to say is… Bring light into the forgotten corners of your house, your life, your heart. There is beauty there, too. x”
Her words, shook me to my core as they reminded me that it is our duty to ourselves to live the life worth living, the one that is best for us, our quality of life, the quality of our futures, as well as others that are affected by us, around us. Sometimes, it is just fine to take breaks while in pursuit of that life. It is just fine to say “okay, I am tired, I am drained, and I need to take some time to sit this out and breathe.” AND, it is also NOT a problem to take extended time off from a project, just as long as you aren’t filling your soul with grief over it, or spiraling into other negative mentalities. Some people just need time. At the end of the day, as Rachel mentions, so much can be revived! What a beautiful thought! I believe when times get tough, when relationships seem funky or are in a tough spot, or a once manifested dream starts to trail into just a thought of “yeah that’s what I wanted to do,” it is simply the subconscious parts of us thinking “I have so much on my plate, which bridges do I burn?” When we are stressed, we run. When we are frustrated, we run. When we are uncomfortable, we run. But, that doesn’t ALWAYS mean that the bridge is burned, or that the door is closed. Sometimes people just need time, to catch up with their souls, to catch their breath, and then breathe that life back into whatever it is they need during that time of their life. Energy can neither be created or destroyed, but it can rest, waiting until the right momentum to kick back in. Life is always being lived, of course, but the goals we set are only actively living when we pursue them.
So, with that being said, breathe life back into yours! Write that book! Make that painting! Walk that dog! Get that job! Pursue that dream! It is all in YOUR hands! OR, if you have been non-stop running, aching for a break, take one! You are allowed to take time for yourself. You are allowed to show up as you are, or not show up at all. However, always be sure to treat yourself with kindness!
(As I mentioned before, I got a new job) This week I am finally coming out of my hiatus by waking up an hour earlier, pressing some juice before work, eating my well thought out meal prepped lunches, going to yoga classes after work or practicing at home, journaling (always journaling), finding venues for some donation-based yoga events, planning for my community yoga class next month, and posting up my business cards I finally ordered when they arrive! What will you do this week to jumpstart a new hobby, dream, or goal?
Happy Sunday ya’ll! Namaste!